Pillow Chuckles

Did you know …

That the Nobel Prize-winning biochemist Gerty Cori claimed that the best sleeping aid was a good laugh before bed? It’s true!

After her death, Cori’s family found a small notebook labeled “Sleeping Pills & Pillow Chuckles” on her bedside table. Among the items listed in the notebook were:

-Hand injuries

-Crocodiles

-Race car accidents

-Deviled legs

-Ballerina explosion

-Alone forever

-Trapped underground

-It is December in Manitoba, an old woman can’t afford to pay her heating bill

A strong association with laughter!

Did you know …

That I just thought of a science-themed joke? It’s true!

Here goes:

So, what do you call …

No, like, What’s the difference between an association and a …

Two scientists walk into a swingers’ club …

Ok, well, I don’t have the full joke ready yet. But the punchline is going to be something about a “causal relationship” or “causal sex,” because I want this to be a grownups-only joke. No need to dumb this one down for dumb little kids, or to make it less sexy for the pre-sexual! It’s going to be pretty good, though, and … I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but I think this one could be a strong contender for the Golden LAughies Awards in April. They can’t keep giving it to puns about mitosis, or whatever, and I think I’m due!

Maybe it goes without saying, because I’ve threatened my readers about this kind of thing before, but I swear to God that if you steal my punchline I will lay an egg inside of you and my child will eat its way out through the top of your goddamn skull, and I will mail what’s left of you to your family. Are we clear?

Until tomorrow … lotsa laffs!